Change

Change is hard – so very hard. But life is full of change. I feel like I have been dealing with an extraordinary amount of change recently. My labels have changed – I am no longer Patch’s caregiver; my label as Drake and Avery’s Mom is changing as they are zooming into adulthood, so my role as their Mom is changing. There are many more, but basically right now I’m in the midst of a lot of change, and frankly, I’m not dealing with it well. I keep joking that I’m trying to decide what I want to be when I grow up, but seriously…what DO I WANT out of this life of mine?

Lately I’ve had a lot of questions. Questions lead me to seek answers, and books have always been a good place for me to find answers. I’ve been reading a lot, listening to audiobooks, and podcasts, and talking to others. I’ll be adding another page to this blog for links to books, programs, products, etc that I truly enjoy and have found benefit from. This isn’t a side-hustle to make money – if you see me endorsing something it’s being utilized in my life, and I’m of the opinion that it is helping make my life better.

One audiobook I was listening to recently discussed how we have to be motivated in order to DO things, but in order to be motivated we have to have ambition. That made me stop and think. One of my struggles is my own personal health and wellness. I KNOW that for myself, it is a set-in-stone FACT that my mental health and physical health are deeply connected. I feel that to be true for many people, but for MYSELF, I know this to be a FACT. And recently, my mental health has been in the shitter. I am stuck in a “Debbie Downer” phase where I am unable or unwilling to reframe things to see the positive. Frankly, it’s really starting to piss me off and worry me a bit, so last night after having that bit of an audiobook resonate with me and then thinking about how that could apply to my own life, I sat down with my iPad and opened my digital planner and wrote out some tasks to accomplish today.

These aren’t huge, mountainous tasks, mind you – so don’t think I’ve conquered some major things. Right now, little things ARE major things. But that’s ok, because that’s where I’m at. I’m teetering on the edge of goo…

I KNOW these facts about myself. If I eat clean, drink water, and get some exercise in each day, I just FEEL BETTER. All around feel better. So today, those were my areas of focus. I am drinking water, I did a workout, and so far I have eaten food that fuels my body. I also have a few other items on my “to do” list today, including getting the guest rooms ready again (we had family stay and two guest rooms needed the bedding washed and replaced), bathe the dog, and make a meal plan for next week. So far so good – everything is done except for some laundry still in the washing/drying stages and the meal planning, but everything else that I had listed is accomplished.

I also know that being creative fills my cup, so as I am nearing the end of my current knitting project, I will plan my next project this weekend, as it will require assistance from my lovely cousin who is an incredibly talented knitter and thinks she can help me through this pattern. I admire her confidence!

My daily goals are to workout, drink 100 oz. of water, and to eat clean. The other items on my “To Do” list should fall into place as the foundational tasks will help me to feel better physically and mentally.

I want a lot of things for my life right now, but I am choosing to focus on three things that I KNOW will make a difference in my mental and physical health. I also KNOW that when my mental and physical health are in better shape, the rest of my life falls into place easier and with less struggle. Today is one day along this path. These are but small steps on the journey, but the steps have been taken today and I feel good about that. Tomorrow I need to remember the feelings from today and push myself to have the ambition to drink the water, get some exercise, and fuel my body with good, whole food.

If you’re stuck, feeling down, or just craving something for your life but can’t define it, look to what you KNOW works for YOU. What makes you feel better mentally and physically? Identify that and then make THAT your ambition. Write it out. Put it in places around your home or workplace. Set alarms on your phone. Do whatever you have to do to remind yourself what your ambition is. Ambition is defined as “an earnest desire for some type of achievement or distinction; desire for work or activity”, so KNOW what your ambition is and then set yourself up to be motivated every day to make it happen. When you have an “off” day, don’t let that derail your entire journey. If I hit 2 of my 3 goals in a day, I cannot let that be the catalyst to giving up completely. We each know our own truth. Stay true to that and see what you can achieve. And remember, above all else – be kind to yourself. You’re the best you there is.